Breakfast 6 AM: Three eggs, three slices of bacon, carrot and green onion

Lunch Noon: Pretty much out of food in the fridge I scraped the last of my almond butter and yogurt into a jar, grabbed an apple and some mixed raw nuts and headed out the door.  It was actually kind of nice to eat a small lunch until…I headed to the store on my way home so that I could make dinner and ended up getting REALLY HANGRY (hungry and angry if you haven’t heard that) and I started twitching inside Trader Joe’s and imagining tearing open bags of potato chips and tubs of ice cream while screaming. I managed to avoid buying anything destructive and let myself have a banana as soon as I got through the check out line.

Photo May 03, 12 16 40 PM

What’s the deal with this? I’m sure part of it is that I fell off the “watching my caffeine consumption at work” wagon and I was crashing from too little food, and too much caffeine at the same time, coinciding with shitty weather and heavy duty end of week impatience and exhaustion but still…I feel like I should be able to go without food for longer. I think I’m bad at being hungry, I’m even afraid of it. I’ve been thinking a lot about it because of reading about Intermittent Fasting a lot on MDA. I want to try it, because I think it might help me deal with some of my irrational food issues, would be good for me physically and would be a satisfying mental challenge to put myself up against. I seriously have this wall up about it though. I feel like if I were to go the whole day without food and I did anything besides lay in bed and moan that I might black out or stab someone, or both. And it’s so hard to decide when to do it, what day do you pick to be miserable? Do I ease myself into it or just go all in and fast all day until sundown next Monday. AH!!

I’ll keep reading and keep thinking on it.

Once I finally got home after an ass kicking week and an ass kicking day I ate some frozen berries and nuts to stave off my rage/hunger combo.  (I think I eat too much fruit and nuts! I don’t know what to do!) Got some work done and then started dinner.

Dinner 7 PM:

This was the first time I cooked myself a conscious cheat meal. I really craved something dense and grainy with my dinner and I had some rice sitting in the cabinet from pre-primal days so I threw it in with some organic chicken thighs, zucchini,and red bell pepper.

Photo May 03, 7 33 03 PM


I am torn about how bad I feel about this. White rice is more of a waste of stomach real estate than being severely detrimental. It’s just sort of empty calories. I feel like it was a good way to cheat considering I was at the grocery store enraged and managed to walk out with the worst thing in my basket being a bottle of red wine and some dried fruit and cashews. But anyone reading feel free to berate me and tell me why I’m a lazy cheater. I can handle it.

Thursday 5/2/13

Breakfast 5 AM: Three eggs, three strips of bacon, green onion, cremini mushroom

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Lunch 11:30 AM: Catch-all refrigerator review salad, basically anything edible in my house thrown in with some vinaigrette

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Afternoon snack: raw nuts

Dinner 6:30 PM: Threw a pork chop in a sage and apple cider vinegar brine this morning, cooked this up with some onion and kale in butter.

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Damn satisfying end to a long day of hard working and hard biking. 17 miles guys, 17 miles. And it was windy.

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Dessert 8 PM: Frozen berries with a scoop of almond butter and dark chocolate chips! I LOVE RAW CRUNCHY ALMOND BUTTER SO MUCH.

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Wednesday 5/1/13

Breakfast 5 AM: 2% Greek Yogurt, apple, flax meal, raisins, sunflower seeds

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Lunch 11:30 AM: Tuna with carrots, cucumber, olive oil, red wine vinegar,capers, green onion, and red leaf lettuce

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Afternoon snack 3 PM: raw trail mix and a couple chunks of cheddar


Dinner 7 PM: Grass fed ground beef with onion, green bell pepper, mushrooms, carrots, italian spices and a can of whole tomatoes cooked down to chili consistency  SO GOOD!

I picked up some Samuel Smith’s Organic Apple Cider tonight wanting a little something to sip on but trying to avoid beer. It turns out even a dry cider is still so sweet to me (since cutting out most sugar) that I can’t control myself and I end up drinking too fast because it’s like drug filled (delicious) candy.  This led to me getting loopy on an empty stomach while cooking before dinner and then eating too much because it was so damn delicious. This made me bummed out and I spent some time lamenting this and berating myself. Which is a waste of time, but I’m just being honest.

Tuesday 4/30/13

Breakfast 6 AM: Three strips of bacon, two eggs, mushrooms, carrot, green onion

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Biked to work: 7 miles

Morning snack: Apple

Lunch: Red leaf lettuce, carrot, cucumber, green onion, Kalamata olives, raw cheddar chunks, balsamic vinaigrette

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Biked home: 7 miles

Afternoon snack 4 pm: frozen berries and small scoop of yogurt

Really hungry but couldn’t stop what I was doing for another hour so I grabbed a handful of lettuce for another snack around 6 pm

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Dinner 7:30 PM: Grass fed beef burgers, topped with lettuce, raw cheddar, avocado and cholula

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My first attempt at burgers! I cooked them in a skillet on my stovetop.

Problems: I have no ventilation in my apartment, I used my cast iron skillet but might try non-stick next time, I cooked them in bacon grease? It was that or butter. I guess I could have done coconut oil but that sounds weird to me. It ended up really smoky, greasy, messy, and smelly. I was nervous about overcooking/undercooking as well. I wanted medium rare, but I wasn’t sure after I cut into them how much more they would cook up after pulling them from the pan. Not sure if I would do this again, might just make ground beef dishes or experiment with meatballs simmered in sauces instead of trying to just fry up meat straight in the pan. Just to clarify, this is not a pretty plate or a convenient or pleasant cooking experience but it was delicious and satisfying.

Monday 4/29/13

Skipped a few days but still doing really well. It was D’s Birthday on Thursday so we went out late and took Friday off. Had some fancy meals but I only cheated on a little sugar here and there and resisted A LOT of temptation so I’m pretty proud of myself. D earned cheating for his birthday but I’ve got no excuse! We had one fancy dinner at the Publican which was a great paleo spot. It wasn’t even a debate of what to order, almost everything was fine. And I had oysters for the first time ever!

So Monday

Breakfast 5 AM: I couldn’t sleep so I got up at 3:30 AM, made some coffee and had a banana. At 5 I cooked up some bacon, eggs, green onions and mushrooms topped with a little raw cheddar. Since I had so much time to spare I also threw a pork chop in some brine for later and did the dishes. Ha.

Biked to work: 7 miles

Morning snack: raw nuts

Lunch: Can of tuna in olive oil, green onion, cucumber, carrot, whole grain mustard

Photo Apr 29, 11 52 25 AM

It was so nice out I got to eat lunch outside! 🙂

Biked home and did some errands including going to pick up some produce: 10 miles (The wind was behind me and it was 70 degrees. I wore shorts, it was amazing.)

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Harvestime: 11$

Exhausted and decided on an early dinner 5:30 PM: Pork chop pan seared with whole garlic, kale, and whole grain mustard

Photo Apr 29, 5 40 28 PM



Wednesday 4/24/13

Breakfast 5:30 AM: Greek yogurt, banana, walnuts

Biked to work: 3 miles

Lunch 11:30 AM: Since I decided to mid-week stay over at D’s place, I didn’t have a lunch packed. *GASP*SHOCK*HORROR* I know! So I had to resort to Hannah’s Bretzel, where I had to bully them into making a no-bread sandwich while they tried to bully me into getting the gluten-free bread. Psh, they didn’t even know what was in it. Ha. Anyway, I got lettuce with turkey, bacon, avocado, tomato, red onion, no dressing, side of almonds and “roasted vegetables” that were really just steamed, but that’s fine too. It cost $13. This is why I pack my lunch ladies and gentlemen.

Biked home: 7 miles WINDY!

Afternoon snack: handful of grapes

Dinner 6 pm: Grass fed ground beef with eggplant, diced tomatoes, garlic, ginger, paprika, oregano, lemon juice, carrot, mushroom and served with spicy yogurt sauce. (Making savory yogurt things is my new favorite addition to meals!) Kind of like greek style spicy eggplant and beef stew. So good. I’m not afraid of ground beef anymore. Both the meals I made were quick, delicious and felt hearty but not greasy. I’m definitely going to add this to the rotation.

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After after: spoonful of almond butter. I’m addicted! 😦

Concerns: I think my portions have been growing. I need to take it easy. Also I have too much food because of not coming home last night and missing two meals I would normally be prepping from my fridge. Concerned I may waste some produce this week. Also my fridge froze my field greens. 😦

Tuesday 4/23/13

Breakfast 6 AM: Three strips of bacon, three eggs, green onion, carrot

Photo Apr 23, 6 15 11 AM

Biked to work: 7 miles

Lunch Noon: Salad with chopped deli turkey, kalamata olives, parsley, field greens, cucumber and tomato

Photo Apr 23, 12 27 15 PM

Afternoon snack: Apple and some hunks of sausage and cheese

I decided to buy some sausages from the local polish sausage shop because of wanting to adventure into new frontiers of meat eating.  Turns out this was a bad idea. They taste pretty good at first but then just left me feeling, greasy, salty, and processed.  😦 I think I am going to steer clear of more processed pork products.

Dinner: Biked to D’s place, got super soaked from standing water in the streets and pouring rain! He gave me dry clothes and  fed me peppers, onions, mushrooms, and italian sausage. Yum.  But…more pork! I went to bed feeling kind of bloated and gross.  Yuck.

Monday 4/22/13

Breakfast 6 AM: Yogurt, apple, almond butter, raisins, flax meal, sunflower seeds

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Morning snack: walnuts

Lunch Noon: leftover tempeh and veggies

First time having tempeh in a while and having it for dinner and lunch the next day left me feeling kind of bloated and gassy. Bummer. It could have used a bit more veg and maybe if I eat the leftovers a bit later in the week instead then I wouldn’t have felt so gross. Then again maybe it’s just that the soy, even though it’s fermented just doesn’t agree with me anymore?

Afternoon snack: Piece of dark chocolate

Dinner 7 PM: Grass fed ground beef, onion, garlic, green bell pepper, cilantro in a mole style sauce and a side of spicy yogurt sauce

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My first time cooking beef for myself! WOO! It was delicious, and it had a much nicer consistency than I remember from conventional ground beef. I could see eating this with some lettuce wraps and some guac with my yogurt sauce but honestly, I can’t see ever buying a whole stupid head of iceberg just to make a device to transport food to my mouth. Maybe some romaine chopped course as a bed for this would make a good taco-salad-esque thing. Anyway, this was delicious, and who needs the tortillas, it just would have made me feel bloated anyway. 🙂

Trying out a new tea, Tadin Seven Blossoms. It has Linden flower, passion flower, valerian root, spearmint, and tilla flowers some of which have been mentioned here. I have had tea with valerian root before and it was really effective at helping me sleep without affecting my dreams or waking normally. I don’t have trouble with sleeping but I do struggle with anxiety, so anything that can coax me into a more peaceful state of mind before sleep means less teeth grinding and weird dreams. ha.  Speaking of, time to get away from this terrible screen!



Shopping 4/21/13 (and catch-up)

Time for the weekend catch-up and news and stuff.


Breakfast: Apple, yogurt, nuts

Lunch: Leftovers from Thursday, Pork and lentils with some carrots and field greens thrown in to bulk it up a bit

Dinner: Cooked for D!  Sorry there aren’t any photos because this was AMAZING. I made collard greens cooked in bacon grease and garlic, sweet potatoes with apple cider vinegar, and pork chops that I brined for two hours. I want to try brining for longer but even just two hours they were so much juicier than when I made the exact same pork chops without brine.

I made it through the whole week  with last Sundays groceries almost but since I was cooking dinner for D I went out after work to pick up all that jazz for us. It ended up being about $30 including a dozen eggs and a bottle of wine. Not bad for a classy meal!

Saturday: Disaster top to bottom. Don’t want to talk about it.

Sunday: Back on the wagon. Got my biking, grocery and laundry on. Very productive.

Photo Apr 21, 11 03 48 AM

Trader Joe’s: $38

Bought Grass fed ground beef! This is going to be my first time cooking with beef, possibly since making meatloaf with my Mom when I was 13? I stood in front of the meat cooler debating it for probably 20 minutes. The people at TJ’s must think I’m such a weirdo for how much time I spend wringing my hands and looking up things on my phone.

Big debates I had today:

Raw cheddar VS. Grass fed pasteurized cheddar (W)

Empire Kosher chicken VS. TJ’s organic chicken(W)

Grass Fed ground beef package (W)  VS. Pre-made patties VS. organic whole cut of beef (not 100% grass fed) VS. Skipping the beef entirely because OH GOD IT’S JUST TOO COMPLICATED

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Harvestime: $17

Thursday 4/13/13

Breakfast 5 AM: Omelette with three eggs, italian sausage, green onion and mushroom

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Lunch Noon: Tuna salad with TJ’s albacore  with homemade mayo, whole grain mustard, green onion, cucumber, carrot, on top of field greens (So good!)

Anyone notice green onions were on sale this week. Eugh.

Afternoon snack: raw trail mix and three slices of turkey and olives

Photo Apr 18, 4 32 35 PM

Dinner: WENT OUT!  I got a delicious pork chop that was perfectly cooked with mushrooms and lentils. This is not quite primal because lentils are considered an “O.K.” food and I have no idea what kinds of oils were used in the dish, though I definitely tasted some butter in there!  Still a pretty awesome option that I could eat out without drawing attention to my current dietary choices. It’s nice that I’ve been so good with my food budget because I splurged a bit on this meal and didn’t feel that terrible about it, plus I saved about half to take home for lunch tomorrow.

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We also shared a side of Brussels sprouts with bacon to start. WOO! I had one beer and one cider.


Dessert: Resisted dessert at the restaurant but had a little something at home. This is the leftover raw trail mix from my afternoon snack with a handful of frozen berries and unsweetened yogurt on top. Felt like I was cheating eating so late and having something so delicious but really, come on. This isn’t Ben and Jerry’s! It’s goddamn grassfed yogurt, raw nuts and frozen berries!

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Even when I’m being so good I’m always nit-picking things I could do better, a blessing and a curse I guess.